Beer Drinking Etiquette
October 19, 2012 Rozanne Woodward 0 Comments
But a few beers too many and one becomes simply an animal themselves. In keeping with the civilized nature for which the witty barman is known, the follow is a short list of Beer Etiquette to follow to keep things smooth between you and your fellow beer drinkers.
Break these rules and its back to sipping prune-o under the fruit tree with Simba the Chimp.
Rule 1: No Dual-Openers Anyone accidentally opening another beer, before finishing their current beer, is cut off. However, double-fisting is allowed.
Rule 2: No Spillage Spilling any amount of beer will get you cut off and thrown out! You better come up with one hell of an excuse to get out of this one.
Rule 3: No Ghosting Forgetting where you left your beer is only forgiven if you don’t break the "5 second rule." Remember where it is in 5 seconds or less and you may continue to indulge.
Rule 4: No Freeloading You may show up once without bringing your own supply. After that, you are cut off!
Rule 5: No Carousing Under no circumstances may you hit on your bud’s spouse, UNLESS your bud says it’s okay!
Rule 6: No Warm Brew Bringing warm (non refrigerated) beer just pisses us off!
Rule 7: No Hyper-Pumpers Take it easy on the keg, you only have to pump it once or twice while the tap is OPEN – get it?
Rule 8: No Pretenders You either can or can’t handle your beer – ‘nuf said.
Rule 9: No Ahhh Shits An ahhh shit is what most of us say when we open the freezer and discover that we left beer in too long! We’ve all done it, but three Ahhh Shits and you’re outta here!
Rule 10: No Butting Accidentally or purposely dropping a cigarette butt into an otherwise good beer will get you thrown out and chastised until the end of time!
Rule 11: No Mine Sweeping There is no excuse for losing track of your beer and grabbing the closest beer as if it were yours…get your own!
Rule 12: No Dead Soldiers No passing out before first finishing your beer!!
Rule 13: No Bring and Switch If you bring it, you drink it. Don’t bring in some cheap-ass, knock off, $4.85 a case beer, and drink the other good beer in the house first.
Rule 14: No Slamming Good Beer No slamming of quality ales or lagers! Good beer is meant to be enjoyed. You may however slam a Bud or a Coors (first beer only ) just to get the taste of the day out of your system. Then enjoy a real beer.
Rule 15: No Updating There is no walking around saying "I’m so wrecked, this is my 8th." If you’re sober enough to remember how many you’ve had, then you haven’t had enough!
Rule 16: No Warm Brew Bringing warm (non-refrigerated) beer just pisses people off!!
Rule 17: Quitchabitchin’ Never complain of the quality or brand of a free drink!