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What do you think of when you think of Singapore?

Mind you, this is strictly a non-political article, so you can cut out all the governmental policy restrictions on banning marijuana, or JBJ, or spitting, or expensive public transport, or whatever it is you think is important in your meaningless insignificant life.

I'm taking about the really important stuff, the entertainment motto of Singapore.

Sun, sand and sea? Sound familiar?

Well, according to a rigged poll (we had to rig it because the red-light district entertainment won hands-down), Singapore has popularity not only for its nightlife (the non-red- light district kind) but also for its beaches. Which is really ironic, since most of them are man-made. At any rate, when you combine them you get the perfect night out: beach party, anyone?

So when my editor told me about a beach party, I was thrilled. Bikini clad ladies running along the beach while water sprays from the sea filled my mind. But when he told me it was at Mohammed Sultan, I was like, huh? I guess it must be a bitch party, not a beach party.

More impressive visions of mud wrestling gals tearing at each other began to form in my mind. And this is what happens when you let your other head do the thinking: you say yes. Guys will do anything for even a hint of girl-on-girl action. And so I made my way down to Cheeky Monkeys, curious to see what the hell was a bitch party all about.

And I discovered I was wrong again. It was a beach party, right in the heart of the urban jungle. Which explains why everyone was dressed in jeans and t-shirts instead of surf shorts and going topless.

Well, the men at least. The ladies, however, knew what exactly to wear for a beach party. Tiny tops with even tinier micro-minis left little to imagination, to the pleasure of everyone else partying there. And when I walked into the club, I was surprised to see there was sand on the floor! This was really a beach party, complete with man-made beach, just like in Sentosa. And the bonus is, it's easier to get to.

It was a night of fun. Bikini-clad girls dancing on the bar top, and coconut cocktails served to all. It was a sea of funky people, experiencing a new first in MS. Smooth moves and smoother music and cocktails. And just like the real beach parties, everyone was sweating and dirrrty-dancing. Some of them could give Christina Aguilera a run for her money, although I'm not too sure if that's a real compliment.

Desirified

I'm always curious to try new stuff. Mind you, that sense of curiosity, and the compulsion to say yes whenever it's offered free has gotten me into a LOT of trouble. Not to mention pain. Think Brazilian wax. Or the other time when I was challenged to eat to Death by Chocolate.

Or the other time when I got into the leather scene. (Well, that wasn't too painful. At least not until the next day.) The rest of my experiences would probably not pass through the media censorship board, so I'm just gonna leave them out right here. After all, this is a family entertainment magazine (erh, I think), right?

So, when I heard of this cool new club opening in Mohammed Sultan, I was a little apprehensive. After all, it wasn't the first time my curiosity got the better of me and ended up with me wishing I hadn't tried.

But Desire II was a surprise of the good kind, much to my relief. Dark purple wallpaper and comfy seating gave it a sensuous and intimate feel, and the rose-shaped light shades which might have looked just a little too tacky somewhere else seemed to go with the decor of the place.

As I enjoyed a very smoothly mixed Twister, (an in-house cocktail), the only other thing I did wish for absentmindedly was a booth so I wouldn't have to keep avoiding the couples which were busy making out all around me. Fortunately, distraction came along in the form of two girls busying themselves to the great R&B set DJ Ice and RJ were spinning, and their grooving kept my attention for a long time.

Desire II stretches out with a design much like its sibling, Desire. Walking in, one sees the bar counter and lounge seats which eventually flows into a dance floor where deejays play R&B, soul and funk, my favourite musics to chill out to, or even dance to. Adding to the great atmosphere is the clientele, who know how to look sharp.

Youngish-looking punks dressed to kill playing pool at the back of the club mixed right along with executive types hanging out at the bar. And the ladies of course wore less and really, isn't that all that matters? It felt like a smaller Balaclava, minus the Jaegermeister jello shots. What's even better are their drinks.

The chain's bartenders know their stuff, and can make up probably every drink you can think of. And with house pours at $35 a jug, who's complaining? Especially if it's your birthday, they make a Waterfall.

I'm not too sure what that is, firstly 'cos it wasn't my birthday, and secondly because I didn't wanna risk alcohol on me, but when it's your birthday, I'm sure that's expected of you. But you do wanna watch out for them, their drinks are strong. It wouldn't be nice to be wearing your Prada mules and puking all over them.

The best thing is, if you simply can't get enough of the Desire factor, you don't have to worry. While Desire II closes at 3-ish, Desire is open till the morning.

That means you can hit Desire II first and groove your night away till the wee hours of the morning, and then hop into a cab and go on to Desire at Circular Road, where you can dance on till 7, and then go straight on to work.